| Carol
|
[Cut to three Rump-owned buildings, including Rump-A-Mart, being demolished. Carol is seen trying to wake Rump, who is fast asleep.] Mr. Rump? Mr. Rump, please wake up, sir.
|
| Rump
|
Oh! No, no, no, go away, Trixie. I have married you twice already.
|
| Carol
|
Get up, sir!
|
| Rump
|
Ah! Wha-? Que pasa?! [Jorge lowers his sleeping mask.] Ah, es muy bueno. [He puts on his toupee.] Now what are you two breakfast burritos doing waking me up at this hour?
|
| Carol
|
There have been... reports of unexplained explosions at several Rump assets.
|
| Rump
|
What?! Caramba... es los ratones. I will teach those miserable Biker Mice to blow up my assets. Assemble the board of directors. This is a crisis! Oh, somebody is going to pay! [Meanwhile, as Rump rants to his advisors, Night Shift sneaks into Rump Plaza.] Oh, up there looks fabulous.
|
| Night Shift
|
[He takes off his helmet, looks both ways, and puts it back on.] Showtime.
|
|
|
"Biker Mice from Mars" theme song
|
| Vinnie
|
[Night Shift escapes successfully with the regenerator. Meanwhile, the Biker Mice are playing a game of basketball at Last Chance Garage.] Yo, bros, watch the Vin Man throw it down. [He makes a basket; the ball is passed to Modo.]
|
| Modo
|
Aw, man, that's the best you got? [He charges, shoots, and hangs off the basket rim, threatening to break it. The ball is passed to Throttle.]
|
| Throttle
|
[Whistles] Put on a few pounds there, big guy? [He performs a front flip, lands, and shoots a basket, cheering.] Yeah! [Modo catches the ball, but it is stolen by Vinnie, who cackles as he runs, rides on his motorcycle, catches air, and lands a basket, landing on the semi and punching in the air triumphantly.]
|
| Vinnie
|
Aaaaow!
|
| Charley
|
If you hot dogs are done working on your highlight reels, you should see this.
|
| Newscaster
|
Police are puzzled by the mysterious explosions at Rump industry complexes.
|
| Throttle, Modo, Vinnie
|
What? / What? / What?
|
| Charley
|
Huh?
|
| Newscaster
|
Multi-bazillionaire Ronaldo Rump read a statement regarding the incident.
|
| Rump
|
I know just the rats who are behind this corporate sabotage.
|
| Vinnie
|
That overstuffed jalapeno thinks we did it? He knows covert destruction is not our style.
|
| Throttle
|
[Modo's eye glows with anger.] Whoa, whoa, whoa. Maintain, bros. Now let's go suss this out.
|
| Carbine
|
Calling Commander Throttle. Do you copy?
|
| Throttle
|
Loud and clear, General Carbine.
|
| Carbine
|
Freedom Fighter Command intercepted Catatonian communiques reporting that a regenerator was taken from Rump's headquarters. We assume you now have it?
|
| Throttle
|
Well, "have" is a strong word.
|
| Vinnie
|
Uh... Uh...
|
| Modo
|
See--
|
| Throttle
|
A-actually... General...
|
| Modo
|
We were... uh--
|
| Vinnie
|
Just about to open our investigation!
|
| Carbine
|
Commander, water scarcity on Mars has reached critical. Time is running out. The Catatonians know this and launched a final assault. We need a regenerator now, or Mars as we know it has no future. Martian High Command has ordered me to Earth to throw everyone we've got on this.
|
| Throttle
|
Ah, well, I assume that means Command no longer trusts us to accomplish our mission?
|
| Carbine
|
No, no, no. It's not like that. Besides, I'd like to think you'd welcome a reason to see me again, Throttle. [Throttle smiles in reassurance.]
|
| Vinnie
|
[Scoffs] What does she see in him that I don't have ten times over? It's one of nature's true mysteries.
|
| Stoker
|
[Stoker is hiding out in the sewers with two regenerators.] Yeah, okay. The second regenerator is ready to go. So I got two of them now. No, I'm coming along to make sure that I get what's mine.
|
| Cop #1
|
Freeze, vile! Oh, a little evil!
|
| Female Cop #2
|
Oh, man. I heard stories of giant alligators down here, but never no giant mice!
|
| Stoker
|
Very funny. It's about time you got here. [The police pin him to a wall and cuff him.] Hey, what's with the rough stuff?
|
| Cop #1
|
So the freak's a comedian! Well, Mr. Big Mouse, let's see if you're laughing when we run your skinny tail in for vagrancy.
|
| Stoker
|
You mean the fat man didn't send you? Then... you're real cops?
|
| Female Cop #2
|
That's right, rat boy. We got a tip there was something weird going on down here.
|
| Cop #1
|
Let's get this lad up into the daylight and get a good look at him.
|
| Stoker
|
You have no idea how bad an idea that is.
|
| Federal Agent
|
High-key representatives of the local constabulary, International Alien Agency. And now, we relieve you of your charge with our heartfelt thanks.
|
| Female Cop #2
|
Well, begging your pardon, J. Edgar, but I ain't received no orders about no international alien hoo-ha, so...
|
| Cop #1
|
[The officers in hazmat suits undress, revealing themselves to be aliens.] Cook County don't pay us enough for this. Gah! Don't fight for this! [The four cops flee; an alien destroys Stoker's cuffs with a tentacle swipe.]
|
| Stoker
|
What took you so long to get here?
|
| Federal Agent
|
Oh, we paused, but for a moment, the more to savor your delicious discomfort.
|
| Stoker
|
[Stoker dissembles the regenerators and places them in a duffel bag.] Forget it, squid-face. I'm the only one I want handling these babies.
|
| Federal Agent
|
But, dear me, don't we have a deal?
|
| Stoker
|
We have a deal when I say we do.
|
| Federal Agent
|
As you wish... General.
|
| Hairball
|
[Catatonian forces catch up with Stoker and the agents.] Ah, I'm loving the smell of fishy vermin in the morning. Comrade! Tell him it appears phase two of his plan is now underway. [He laughs maniacally; Carbine is flying solo to Earth.]
|
| Carbine
|
Setting course, ship freed of Martian gravity. Data computer, upload files of Biker Mice missions. [A archived file plays of Throttle giving a report.]
|
| Throttle
|
Commander Throttle with a classified debriefing of the Plutarkian conflict. Hard as it is to believe now, Mars was once a much greener place. We had meadows, snow in the mountains, and water. Plenty of water. Then came the global warming. Mars dried out. But just when things seemed badder than bad, our planet was replenished by the Regenerator, a device invented by Stoker, a brilliant young officer. Once again fertile, Mars came under attack from Plutark. Those fish-faced freaks showed up to strip mine our planet, to replenish their own wasted resources. [The Biker Mice are shown cheering and attacking invading forces.] After the Plutarkian defeat on Mars, their plan shifted towards an easier target: the Earth. Mars sent General Stoker and the Regenerator to Earth to heal the Plutarkian damage to its environment. But, as they say, even the best-laid plans of mice and, well, mice... [A young Stoker, set course for Earth, is attacked by Plutarkian ships; he is hit and plummets towards Earth, where a young and bald Ronaldo Rump is begging a customer to buy one of his used cars.]
|
| Rump
|
Oh, come, come, amigo. Let me tell you, this car will make you muy macho with la señoritas. [The car falls to pieces and the customer walks away.] I'll throw in an 8-track tape player! And my Numero's Greatest Hits! Ay caramba, this job stinks. Oh, if only I could be rich. I would sell my soul to-- [A spaceship crashes next to his lot.] Aliens? Hm, maybe somebody up there likes me. Ah, you there! Amigo! You look like you are maybe in the market for a new vehicle today?
|
| Stoker
|
[He wearily exits the destroyed cockpit, regenerator in hand.] Ooh, impact must have blurred my vision. You look like a big-butt, bald guy.
|
| Rump
|
Oh, El Grande Mouse. So, how are Mickey and Minnie? Heh heh heh! I kid you, I've seen weirder. What are you, from Mars or something?
|
| Stoker
|
Yeah, something like that. [As he dusts himself off, he accidentally knocks the regenerator down, causing it to blast and instantly fix his ship.]
|
| Rump
|
Wow, that is a pretty good trick. How much you want for your toy?
|
| Stoker
|
Sorry, not for sale. [He begins to walk away.]
|
| Rump
|
But, come on, amigo. We could make mucho dinero with that thing.
|
| Stoker
|
No, thanks.
|
| Rump
|
[Rump eyes a toolbox sitting on top of a ladder Stoker is standing next to.] Oh, Ronaldo, what you are thinking is very bad, no? [He kicks the ladder, causing the toolbox to fall onto Stoker's head, knocking him unconscious.] Lo siento. I'm very sorry, but you should have ducked. [He chortles and attempts to figure out how to work the regenerator. He smacks it, causing it to turn the previously destroyed car into a black limousine.] Now that's what I'm talking about. [He places a "For Sale" sign on Stoker's ship, and slinks into town, creating instant buildings.]
|
| Throttle
|
Meanwhile in Chicago, we Biker Mice were holding our own in our running battle with the Big Cheese - Lawrence Limburger.
|
| Limburger
|
Time for the final trap to spring on you, you vile vermin.
|
| Vinnie
|
[The Biker Mice thwart plans to dig up Wrigley Field.] Stinky Cheese Man is digging up our digs!
|
| Modo
|
Let's teach him about uninvited guests.
|
| Greasepit
|
Huh?! [The Biker Mice surround the machine, launching grappling hooks at the machine's legs and toppling it to the ground, sending Greasepit flying and lamenting something unintelligible into a porta potty.]
|
| Throttle
|
[Two more soldiers fire at the mice from the stands.] Me thinks we need to go to overtime with these goons. Plan 7, bros!
|
| Vinnie
|
Aaaaaow! [He jumps in the air and lights a shuriken.] Banana kick! [He kicks a flaming shuriken at the pair of gunmen, striking them on impact.] Ooohhhhhhhhh! [He lands atop his bike.]
|
| Modo
|
[The pair chase Modo and Throttle on their vehicles; Modo and Throttle cross, causing them to crash into each other.] Ha ha ha! Two-touch style!
|
| Greasepit
|
Thunder slide tackle, yous biker boob! [He launches a bazooka missile at Throttle, who dodges and fires back with a handgun, knocking the brute down into a nearby hot dog cart, mouth full of sausages.]
|
| Throttle
|
[The three mice meet back up, Throttle chuckling at their victory.] Looks like we red carded their team.
|
| Karbunkle
|
[Karbunkle hides behind a goalpost, laughing as he freezes the Biker Mice from behind with an ice bomb launched from his head.] Perfect! Biker Mice on ice!
|
| Limburger
|
[Cut to Limburger Plaza, where the frozen Biker Mice are being held hostage on the rooftops, hanging on the wall in handcuffs.] Now, my dear doctor, if you don't mind.
|
| Karbunkle
|
Oh, yes, yes, of course, oh pompous provolone. [He unfreezes the mice.]
|
| Throttle
|
Now what, you fat fermented fondue?
|
| Limburger
|
My esteemed mice, I have enjoyed our spirited sparring, lo, these many years. But alas, all good things must end, so time has come to ring down the curtain on my mission here on Earth. As we speak, an enormous Plutarkian dusty body is moving into Earth orbit. When activated, it shall simply suck into its gaping maw anything non-Plutarkian.
|
| Karbunkle
|
Course, we'll need the bugs and drapes. And a very pleasant pine scent.
|
| Vinnie
|
You six-wiz cheese!
|
| Limburger
|
Yes, quite. When I scanned before Lord High Camembert and present him the material riches of the Earth, crowds will cheer and he will smile most favorably upon me. Oh, who am I kidding? I'll bounce that fat sardine out of his throne and I'll become Plutark's new Grand Poobah! If you will, dear doctor, please commence Operation Giant Sucking Sound.
|
| Karbunkle
|
With utmost pleasure, your Havarti-ness. [Karbunkle activates the machine, sucking up satellites and other Earth resources, laughing maniacally with Limburger.]
|
| Federal Agent
|
[Cut to Stoker's arrest.] Forgive this snug accommodation, General, but we must account for your unfortunate predilection of transforming into a rat.
|
| Carbine
|
[Cut to Carbine, still traveling to Earth.] Resume archival Plutarkian file download. [The flashback resumes; three aliens appear before Greasepit, who is guarding Limburger Plaza.]
|
| Greasepit
|
Huh?! Hey! This is private property. Eh, yous just got an appointment? [The aliens begin firing at Greasepit and his guard, who run for cover; they make it to the roof to warn Limburger, collapsing in the door frame.] Boss! Oh, Mr. Limburger. Oh, Captain, my Captain!
|
| Limburger
|
Not now, my oleaginous oaf. Can't you see I'm savoring my triumph? What do you... [The aliens appear.] ...want? [They fire again, everyone running for cover.] Oh, dear...! [He flees; one alien throws a shuriken-like device and frees the Biker Mice from their chains. The aliens continue to overwhelm the Plutarkian forces, allowing the mice to escape.] Even if I must be parched, you are too late! The program is locked in and can't be turned off. Adieu, Biker Mice! [Limburger and the rest of his gang leave in an elevator.]
|
| Vinnie
|
Well, you ladies really know how to crash a party. What do you do for an encore? [The aliens flee.] Hmph! [The mice leave and land in the aliens' spaceship.]
|
| Modo
|
Oh, mama.
|
| Throttle
|
Hey, uh, thanks for your help. You got a name?
|
| Alien #1
|
Our world is also under Plutarkian threat. We were sent to assist you.
|
| Vinnie
|
Yeah, like we're supposed to just trust the first guys who made a left at Saturn and dropped in to help.
|
| Modo
|
Come on, chill, Vincent. When you got a planet to save, you can't be too choosy.
|
| Throttle
|
Now, do you suppose we could hitch a ride up to that big all-day sucker in the sky? [The mice head to the vacuum, their bikes and gear converted to fly in space; the mice make steady progress in destroying its offensive.] You guys dance with those attack lasers while I figure out how this bucket's wired. [Throttle finds its control settings, switch to "Earth" as opposed to "Plutark".] Well, well, well. Anything non-Plutarkian, eh? Time for dealer's choice. [Throttle switches it to the "Plutark" setting, ceasing the machine's actions to Limburger's dismay.]
|
| Limburger
|
Why am I not surprised? [Limburger and his henchmen are sucked up, behind them including Napoleon Brie, two Plutarkian henchmen, and Limburger Plaza itself, and makes its way back to Plutark.]
|
| Throttle
|
Truth in advertising. Stronger than dirt. [He makes a report to Carbine.] Every last stink butt on Earth sucked back home to Plutark. Invasion over. Disgraced, Limburger was exiled from Plutark and sentenced to return to Earth. The time had come for our return home.
|
| Charley
|
[Cut to Last Chance Garage, where the Biker Mice are saying their goodbyes.] So, no chance of you maybe wanting to hang here for a while longer?
|
| Throttle
|
Want and can are two different things, Charley. You see, we've been called back to Mars.
|
| Modo
|
Sweet Mars, oh, mama.
|
| Vinnie
|
You ever need us, kiddo, just whistle. You know how to whistle, don't you? Just put your lips together and... [He whistles an abysmal note.] Oh, man.
|
| Charley
|
Ow!
|
| Throttle
|
Whoa. No prob hearing that all the way to Mars.
|
| Charley
|
A real Vinny-style goodbye, eh, friend? [Carbine opens the cockpit to her ship; the mice turn to leave and wave one last goodbye.]
|
| Throttle, Modo, Vinnie
|
Rock and ride, Charley.
|
| Charley
|
Ride free, citizens. [Cut to the future, where Rump is using the ruins of Limburger Plaza to create Rump Plaza with his regenerator.]
|
| Rump
|
Ha! The perfect location for Rump Plaza. [The three aliens from before appear before Rump.] Stay away! You want money? I have money! See? Look, it's money! Take it, take it!
|
| Alien #1
|
[The aliens shapeshift into Catatonian Shapeshifters.] We've not come to rob you, Earthman. We are an advanced force sent from the Catatonian star system. [They present to Rump a horde of Claw Troopers, led by Cataclysm.]
|
| Rump
|
Oh, yes, los gatitos, eh? Well, what do you want with the Ronaldo?
|
| Alien #1
|
There are areas where our mutual interests in this planet uniquely converge. We propose to make you even wealthier than you are now in exchange for you providing us cover for our Earth activities.
|
| Rump
|
Ah, wealthier, hmm? That could be interesting. Anything else?
|
| Alien #1
|
Information on what happened to the inventor of that curious little device of yours.
|
| Rump
|
Oh, that guy is such a sad story, you know. Yeah, he's on the streets... somewhere. Muy loco, you know. Cuckoo, cuckoo. So, back to business. This, how you say...
|
| Alien #1
|
Call it an arrangement.
|
| Rump
|
An arrangement. Okay, it's a deal. Let's shake on it. [Cataclysm horns in and shakes his hand, but Rump hesitates.] Eh, maybe not. [Cataclysm intimidates Rump; the report cuts back to Throttle.]
|
| Throttle
|
End Plutarkian archival debriefing. [Carbine lands in Chicago in real time, and find the Biker Mice in the semi. Throttle shows her his findings.] General, we're tracking tetrahydrocarbon deposits in the Detroit area. Same direction as Stoker's DNA readings.
|
| Vinnie
|
But if Stoker's fingered the regeneramajig, why not just bring it to us? I mean, we can all go back to Mars, game over.
|
| Carbine
|
Huh, strange. Stoker's DNA scan just split into two separate locations.
|
| Vinnie
|
[Whistles] I knew Stoker was a split personality, but I didn't realize just how split. [The mice and Charley travel to the readings' location in Detroit; Carbine issues a game plan.]
|
| Carbine
|
Throttle, take your unit and check out this facility. Charley and I will go investigate the other Stoker signal.
|
| Modo
|
[The trio investigate; Modo tears open a gate with his thermal laser.] Something doesn't feel right about this.
|
| Throttle
|
I know, but the stakes for Mars are just too high and Stoke's our only lead.
|
| Modo
|
Stoke mode, bros. Run silent, run deep. [They ride in and are suddenly surrounded and exposed under a pair of spotlights.]
|
| Vinnie
|
Oh, hello.
|
| Throttle
|
Oh, man. [The mice turn to leave but are blocked by the federal agent and a barrage of soldiers.]
|
| Federal Agent
|
Surrender in the name of the International Alien Agency, gentlemen. Or should I say, gentlemice?
|
| Throttle
|
We can't tangle with these guys in case they really are the lawful authorities. Let's just play along. See if they lead us to Stoke.
|
| Modo
|
[The mice are taken into custody and pass by various alien inmates, most of them the mice find repulsive.] Oh, mama, get a load of the mug on that one.
|
| Vinnie
|
Eeeeyuck! I think I dated her once.
|
| Modo
|
My spider sense tells me these guys ain't who they say they are.
|
| Vinnie
|
[The three enter an open cell, activating its laser bars.] Mouse, you got spider sense?
|
| Throttle
|
No, not really. But he's kind of sensitive about it.
|
| Federal Agent
|
With our little country time at an end, I may now dispense with this masquerade. [He rips off his head to reveal himself as Lawrence Limburger; as the mice are in shocl, he puts on his normal human disguise.]
|
| Vinnie
|
Stink-face!
|
| Throttle
|
Limburger!
|
| Modo
|
The big cheese!
|
| Limburger
|
The very same. Lawrence Lactavius Limburger, Esquire, at your service. [Karbunkle and an apprehended Stoker appear on either side of him.]
|
| Throttle
|
Stoke! Wh-- how... why?!
|
| Vinnie
|
Figures. Once a rat, always a rat. [Vinnie charges at Stoker, but is electrocuted by the cell bars.]
|
| Limburger
|
Forgive me, but while I'd love to stay and indulge in quaint nostalgia, I left some plans simmering on my stove. Adieu, adieu. [He leaves, laughing maniacally, Stoker looking to the bros before following Limburger out.]
|
|
|
To be continued...
|
|
|
"Biker Mice from Mars" credits theme
|
